thanks juan. and thanks sander and harry - i did watch the video.
i guess i was looking for a per-sample parameter to set rather than a global parameter. i don't know if it makes sense from the algorithm's point of view to set the tolerance on a per-sample basis, though. in the end i had to set the tolerance to 4.560 to pick up all my samples. the thing that worries me about this is that in the darker parts of the original image, the high tolerance would seem to be accepting stars as part of the background. i did my best to move the samples off of stars but there are too many stars...
i think this is a very extreme case. it was kind of an experiment - 8 minute subexposures of the orion area with a 50mm lens, through a CLS filter. the light pollution to my south includes all of silicon valley, so the gradient is huge. i managed to remove the gradient, but the final image has some color casts that i had to remove with SCNR. the extracted background looked reasonably smooth though.